Love & Marriage; An Irregular Marriage

William Grosart and Margaret Shaw were my husband's 6x great grandparents. William Grosart was born in Borthwick, Midlothian, Scotland in 1752, and was baptised in the kirk there on 27th October 1752. Borthwick was very close to Temple, the parish that was to be involved with proving his marriage, 20 years after his birth. Temple is of course, famous for it's connection with the Knights Templar, and all the legends connected to the Holy Grail etc. William was one of six children born to Ebenezer Grozer and Jean Carter. It's not possible to work out when or where Margaret was born, nor who her parents were.

Borthwick Castle

Together William and Margaret had 9 children, the first of which was my husband's 5x great grandfather; Ebenezer Grozer (1772 - 1858). William and Margaret were married for 28 years. before William passed away in 1800, but there is no marriage certificate for them; not on Ancestry, Scotland's People, or in any archive. This is because their marriage was 'irregular'; the only record to be found of their union is in the Temple Kirk Sessions of 1772. So, before I tell the tale of their union, let me explain a little about 'irregular marriage'.

Temple Old Kirk is now in ruins.

In Scotland, in 1772 and for many other generations both before and after, marriage could be achieved both by regular means (being married by a priest, after banns had been read), or by irregular means. An irregular marriage could take a variety of forms, but all were equally legal, and were based around the idea of mutual consent.

One form of irregular marriage would today be considered as a 'common law' marriage. Marriage by cohabitation with habit and repute basically involved a man and woman living together, and behaving in all ways, as a married couple. Evidence for this kind of marriage might include the couple referring to each other as 'wife' or 'husband', and engaging in displays of affection. There was an assumption that if a couple had shown themselves as married for a reasonable length of time, consent for the marriage had been agreed.

A second form of irregular marriage was officially referred to as Per Verba de Futuro Subsequente Copula. This was an irregular marriage in the form of a promise to marry in the future, which would be followed at a later time, by 'carnal intercourse'. 

Due to the irregular marriage practice in Scotland, English couples, desirous of a quick marriage without questions,  would hasten to the famous blacksmith at Gretna Green.

The type of irregular marriage that William and Margaret were 'guilty' of, was the third type of irregular marriage; Per Verba de Praesenti. This was where a couple exchanged words of mutual consent to be married. This could be in a private, or informal setting, and would ideally be witnessed. An unwitnessed version of this type of marriage was considered legal, but was of course, harder to prove.

Prior to the mid 1500s all three forms of irregular marriage were common place throughout Europe. After the Council of Trent in 1563 however, the Roman Catholic Church banned all irregular types of marriage and determined that marriage would only be considered legal if conducted in front of a priest. Scotland resisted this change, on the militancy of the members of the lay kirk sessions. (Kirk is the Scottish term for church, and the session was a form of church court.)

The Ordination of Elders in a Scottish Kirk, John Henry Lorimer

Despite the desire to retain the choice of irregular marriage, it was important to the church parish to establish which marriages were true, and which were false. This was firstly, for the reason of morality; a system of discipline was enforced by the church courts, to ensure that all members of the parish were 'godly'. It was considered by the Church of Scotland, that godly discipline was a sign of the true church. It was believed that this godly discipline had to be a communal effort, for it to count in a spiritual sense. Additionally, the insistence that irregularly married couples appeared at the church courts was an effective way to assert authority. On purely practical level, the kirk needed to know who belonged to their parish, so they would know to whom to offer poor relief. If an irregular marriage could be proved then the children from that union would be supported by the husband's parish kirk. If however, the marriage could not be proved the children would need to seek assistance from the mother's parish kirk. A record of marriages, both regular and irregular, was necessary to the management of poor funds.

Irregular marriage was an attractive solution when marrying in a hurry was required, perhaps because a baby's birth was increasingly imminent, and it seems that this may have been the case for William and Margaret. By March or April of 1772 Margaret was probably aware that she was expecting, and the Temple Kirk session notes suggest that she and William claim to have been married in Edinburgh by consent, on January 23rd, 1772, ie before the conception of this child. They cited a Charles Johnson as witness to their irregular marriage. Apparently the lay members of the Temple kirk did not believe this story, and for whatever reason chose to pronounce that irregular marriage false. 

The Black Stool (Stool of Repentance) by David Allan

Perhaps William and Margaret expected the kirk to make this proclamation, because they chose to go ahead and make a second (or perhaps first) irregular marriage on the 29th August, 1772. Their case was heard at the Temple kirk sessions on the 20th September 1772.

TEMPLE KIRK SEPTEMBER 20TH 1772

(in margin; William Grozer & Margaret Shaw compear before the session & confess their irregular marriage)

After prayer sederunt (a prolonged sitting) the session.

This day William Grozer and Margaret Shaw (in consequence of a citation formerly intimated to them) attended the session and being called compeared (appeared at the session) and being interrogate as to their irregular marriage produced lines (records) for the same dated at Edinburgh January 23rd 1772 and subscribed by one Charles Johnson. But the falsehood of this pretended date being immediately detected and the true date of their marriage discovered to have been upon the 29th of August last for which dissimilation they were sharply rebuked by the minister as also for their irregular conduct relative to their marriage and after (they being declared married) were recommended to the study of sound and unfeigned repentance and a more orderly course of life for the future and so for this time dismissed. The session concluded with prayer.

We will never know if William and Margaret's January irregular marriage was true or not. Irregular marriages are troublesome for genealogists due to their lack of record. But it is interesting to me that the supposed story of being irregularly married in January would make a pregnancy conceived in February legitimate. Nevertheless, they were 'properly' married in August, when she was 6 months pregnant (assuming the baby was born at full term), and 7 months pregnant when the couple were admonished, and sentenced to repentance and prayer. Just two months after the hearing at the Temple Kirk session William and Margaret's first child was born; Ebenezer Grozer. 

William and Margaret went on to have 8 other children. William Grozer died on the 8th May 1800, and Margaret died on the 2nd February, 1821. They were both laid to rest in Colinton, Midlothian, Scotland.

The villlage of Colinton, in the 19th century

From the 1st January 1855 all marriages in Scotland were required to be registered, but the system of irregular marriage in Scotland continued until 1939, when it was finally overturned in favour of either a marriage conducted by a minister, or by a registrar. 

A Highland Wedding, David Allan

William and Margaret were certainly married, as the Temple Kirk session proved, even if it was irregular. Since there is no way of proving love, one can only hope at that. Nine children certainly does hint that there was more than a touch of love! #Grosset

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https://www.nationalgalleries.org/art-and-artists/9643/borthwick-castle

https://www.scotlandspeople.gov.uk/article/irregular-marriage-and-kirk-session-scotland

https://academic.oup.com/jsh/article/47/2/507/1325355

https://templemcp.wixsite.com/mysite

https://www.nationalgalleries.org/art-and-artists/8323/black-stool-stool-repentance

https://www.legacy-quest.com/post/scotland-s-kirk-session-records-a-hidden-gem

https://www.scotsman.com/news/opinion/columnists/despite-kirks-disapproval-scotlands-long-tradition-of-irregular-marriage-proved-remarkably-resilient-susan-morrison-4460665

https://www.jstor.org/stable/24532010

https://www.scotlandspeople.gov.uk/guides/record-guides/kirk-session-records